Things, stuff, and other items of interest

December 6, 2009

In search of a topic....

Well, that backfired a bit. It would seem, the two or three of you that read this thing are fans of stories that star overweight narcoleptics who attend puppet shows that cater to the 'sexual deviant' demographic. Huh,.... well,.... ya, how about that?

Last week's post accomplished a couple of things:
  1. Set a new record for comments! w00t! (Thanks CT & Dave)
  2. Set a new record for unique visits per day as reported by Google Analytics. (Once again, thanks CT & Dave!)
  3. Has established a peak that I'm reasonably sure I won't match again. So thanks for coming out folks, don't forget to tip the waitress.
And there in lies the problem.

I've been trying to come up with something to write about for the last few days. I've been dredging through my very foggy recollections for stories that may entertain if only briefly. Which brings us back to a point that was made fairly soundly a few posts back: I lead an unbelievably dull life. You can see where this starts to turn sour. To add to the problem, I've carefully cultivated a site that lacks any sort of defined theme so as to suggest a topic for a given day.

Politics? I've reformed. I use to wax poetic on the topic at the drop of a hat, but I like to think I've wised up some. What matters the perspective of the ant to the one holding the magnifying glass? A touch melodramatic perhaps? A little too fatalistic? Okay, fair point. Basically what it comes down to is I change my mind too often. How can I possibly comment or offer up even the most minute modicum of wisdom if I can't resolve these issues for myself?

Another topic that lends itself to discussion: techie stuff. I'm at least a sixty watt bulb when it comes to computer matters and there's got to be something worth yakking about in there right? HA! I get emails, phone calls, and knocks on the door from family, neighbours, friends, co-workers, and passers-by-on-the-street as it is. Why for the love of all that is good on this planet would I invite more? This is a topic that will almost certainly be revisited in the future, if only to add my voice to the well-trod ground of geek-whining re: Being the free tech-support guy. It sucks. If you're a geek you already know this. If you're not a geek then you're a perpetrator. Solidarity my geek brothers & sisters! SOLIDARITY! We shall overcome.

And so the list begins to form:

  • Religion? See the entry for "Politics" listed above, only add more zealots.
  • Motorcycles? This topic is really only interesting to other riders, and to be honest, it's not a topic that lends itself easily to the written word. No doubt I'll come back to it in the future, but it's with a sense of the inevitable that I won't do it adequate service. It's like catching a fart with a fish net... it just can't be done. I've read a lot on the topic and if I may be so bold, I'll go so far as to say that few (if any) are able to capture that spirit with words. Fewer still capture it on film.
  • The wild and crazy stories of a bachelor living the good life in the big city? I would direct you to my last entry to quash that suggestion.
  • Video games? Please, I'm a geek... not a nerd. I waste WAY too much time on them. The only people who want to hear my opinions / thoughts about video games are other video game geeks. You know who you are. Yes, you. However, since we're on the topic - Assassin's Creed II is the freaking BOMB yo!
  • Movies? Meh. It's kind of been done to death hasn't it? Does it really matter what I think about a film you aren't going to remember hearing about next week anyhow? 
  • Books? There's really only one thing to be said on this topic: Read as many as you possibly can. Good, bad, Oprah-approved, Government censored, best sellers, obscurity fated single printers, comics, religious texts, lunatic propaganda, self help books. It doesn't matter. Okay, maybe not the self help books, they suck... but everything else is good. Read more. Always read more.
  • Food / Cooking / Restaurant reviews. Already did that. If you are able to find "3 guys from the 'burg" flash back anywhere let me know. I've looked more than once and couldn't find it. Besides, food reviewing is not a venture best accomplished individually, it just seems pathetic and lonely. Besides, if done in the company of others, you can steal stuff off of their plate in the interest of "research".
I could keep going but after the first twenty points or so, it just sounds like whining. So now that I've firmly defined what I'm not going to do on this site (and have been for the last 3 months now) I should probably get started on what I am going to do. Did I mention navel gazing? I think I did. Lots and lots of navel gazing.

A quick note a little off (non-existent) topic: I found an article on Macleans this week that I thought was an interesting read. I'd encourage you to check it out. I'd give you some hint about what to expect for the next entry, but I wouldn't be fooling anyone by suggesting I had some clue what it would be.


Larry Tate said...

Your that close to Hull and you can't find topics to blog about? You need to find some more hobbies, or get some new addictions. Start putting something in those cookies.

Unknown said...

There's only so many monkeys my back can support, so I'll stick with the raisin and/or chocolate chip cookies for now. A new hobby though, that's not a bad idea. Competitive free-style knitting anyone?

Unknown said...

New hobbies are always a good idea. The problem is finding interesting ones. I like you lead a dull life, bar the customer support that i get dragged kicking and screaming into doing every so often at work. It reminds me little by little how screwed we are as a human race... I can't remember where I heard the quote but it applies.
"We're trying ver hard to make computers easier to use on a daily basis...but at the same time the universe is competing by creating people with lower and lower levels of intelligence....the universe is winning."

Dave said...

Breaking the record with this one!

I enjoyed the "work friend" story, although I would be reluctant to encourage further stories on this line as I'm sure I may recognise myself doing something entirely inappropriate... Although if you gave me a cool name (like "Thor" or "Captain amazing") I would be less inclined to whine or complain, it would also give me an opportunity to comment about myself in the third person "what a cool guy that captain amazing is!".

As a person who picks up hobbies on a frequent basis I can't say enough good things about them, I can also say that sometimes they don't stick and you wind up with a basement full of crap that you don't need/want.

I would be interested to hear what you have to say on the subject of motorcycles (I've heard a fair amount already but it's my latest hobby and I'm still in sponge mode).

If I may also be so bold as to suggest you take a few drinks of Rye and let loose the topic of religion, I think that would be most interesting.

Just out of curiosity you can't ban me or change my profile on this can you? I mean you techies and your low ethical thresholds might take advantage of having admin privileges

Unknown said...

@ Andrew:
The closest I was able to find was this one:

“Programmers are in a race with the Universe to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs, while the Universe is trying to create bigger and better idiots. So far the Universe is winning.” - Rich Cook

An apt & disturbingly accurate quote.

@ Dave:

A new record! w00t! No worries, rest assured if I write a story in which you play a role, you'll be sure to get a pseudonym of distinction. What was that first user name you chose in DG again?

You raise a good point and I though I had better address it while it's still a minor point:

Commenting on this blog is moderated by yours truly. Since you folks can comment anonymously, all comments need my stamp of approval before getting posted. It's not a perfect system, but it's the one we've got. I can't edit, change, or mutilate your text in any way, I only get the option of posting or not posting.

Now then, who wants to hear a story about the time a geriatric stripper visited Dave's house?